The Courtesy Jar

The Courtesy Jar

Courtesy Means:

1.	excellence of manners or social conduct; polite behavior.

2.	a courteous, respectful, or considerate act or expression.

STOP BEHAVIOR = Marbles OUT	START BEHAVIOR = Marbles IN
Tantrums, Arguing, whining, complaining	Following Directions Taking initiative (doing things without being told) Doing something kind Being safe and respectful

1 Marble can be earned each day!

7 Marbles = REWARD

(Determined @ weekly family meeting on Sunday evening @ 7 p.m.)
So we have been struggling some at our house recently with arguing, whining, complaining, and just flat not listening. I adapted this idea for the "Courtesy Jar" a couple years ago and decided to bring it back out and give it a spin. It really helped curtail these unwanted behaviors when we used it before. I hope it works again. Personally, I am having a hard time with our FD's occasionally nasty and obnoxious behaviors. I know that she is "acting out" a lot of strong emotions at times - but other times I feel like she is just behaving like a regular kid- sometimes good, sometimes there's a lot to be desired! I'd like to help her move along and I want to be sure that I'm helping her learn what behaviors are okay and which ones aren't. There is a very fine line between what behaviors one needs to have patience with and those that you just need to nip in the bud. Having a child who has had a challenging life and inconsistent parenting in the past means that you have to try to help them learn that their experiences do not define them. Having a rough life is not an excuse for bad behavior. Kids have to learn to make good choices for themselves. I know these things, but how to effectively pass that message on to children is really hard! I want to be a friend, I want to be an ally, but I also need to be a parent - not a doormat. Ugg... this parenting stuff is WORK! Wish us luck with the courtesy jar- hope it inspires you too in your quest for happy and healthy family interactions!