Saturday, March 5, 2011

Our Antlers Up

Okay, so again, for educational purposes, I wanted to share the process that occurs in my mind when I get a call, like the one I got yesterday about getting a possible placement.
The case worker calls and gives some very limited information about the children... their ages, any health concerns, that's about it.
My mind starts to race...my first thought is probably, "Am I insane for even considering saying yes?" My second thought is, "How can we make this work" Then my mind goes blank and I can't think of any other questions and I'm just like, uh okay...
What I have to say to the case worker... which is really surprisingly hard...is, "Um, okay we might be able to do this. We'll think about it and call you back later with more questions."
Then... I look in my notebook with my list of questions that I was told in training (and in books) to ask. Then I think about space concerns, try to inventory the equipment we have, imagine how/where children would fit and consider logistics. At this point, I don't even worry about if the children will be likable, really challenging, or if we will all figure out how to get along. That part seems 1) inevitable and 2) out of my hands until the children are actually here.
I mean, if I know I'll need childcare for the children, I call and find out if area facilities have openings. Then once I have it all mapped out and feel like it would work and I am actually excited about the possibilities again.
Next, I feel weird and pause because the case worker only offers info if I ask and I really don't know if I should be expending this energy thinking about all this because there is still no telling if the children will be placed with us at all. Then, I realize that its good that I did because IF the kids are placed with us, we'll be somewhat ready. Finally, I have to force myself to let go. I have to just say if they come we can handle that scenario and if they don't we'll just go along and at some point other kids will come.

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